My mom had a twin. Not identical but they were a lot alike in looks and in their ways. I always liked coming over and visiting the twin’s family, especially those many years ago when they lived here at Allen. They had two boys (among their many assorted children) about my age. I did receive some worried attention from the Ray family about my being skinny. But I felt like I was OK.

My mom and her twin sister Jane tended toward hypochondria. Both suffered from a myriad of minor disorders and this led to my Aunt Cora (aka Jane) to discover a Chiropractor over in Ada. “He’s a wonder and is doing so much for me,” said Aunt Jane to my mom. He had Aunt Jane under a one-year plan which was to restore her health and safeguard against cancer. It would also fix her small intestine which somehow had entangled itself around her heart. Symptoms included shortness of breath, chronic tiredness and various other pains and miseries.

I, as an eleven-year-old, was skeptical. My mom had previously suffered cancer symptoms but had survived them all. Yes, you guessed it. Mom developed identical symptoms Aunt Jane enjoyed. Aunt Jane had shared the fact that she was a twin with her doctor. He assured her that if one twin had this horrid disease the other was sure to have it too. The Dr. told Aunt Jane to have mom come over for a free X-Ray. She did. I went with her to baby sit my little sister Sue. We both enjoyed going with mom on her adventurous trips.

Well, you guessed it. The X-Rays confirmed that mom had this horrible and often “fatal” congenital disorder. He gave her a free treatment ry Com but warned her it would take a year of intensive weekly treatments in his office to affect a total and guaranteed cure. She paid up.

The next week mom, Sue and, of course, me made our first trip to the clinic. After this treatment mom felt oh so much better and the next trip, I heard her say to the “doctor”, “I want you to look over my little boy. He looks sick too.” Sue heard it too and we were both alarmed. And well we should. Yes, the doctor, his nurse and office help all came out. I am feeling like an innocent victim. Sue whimpered a little but kept a low profile, but she need not worry. She was a healthy plump little 6-year-old.

I soon found myself in a back room among strange looking machines. Mom and the big nurse made me get undressed and in a gown. The nurse and doctor thumped my ments belly and listened with a stethoscope. “He will need 12 treatments and I think we can make a healthy little boy out of him for you.” They put me on a gigantic sink-metal board with plumbing. “Gastric Lavage” will work wonders for this little guy. Lavage, it turns out involves the complete washing out my colon with a garden hose.

This miracle treatment left me sort of weak and “washed out” and the next week mom dragged me back in. Again. I was mortified. My siblings knew all about this and soon so did my school mates and teacher and all of Stonewall. My name was on the prayer list and my treatments were detailed. I told mom that I was sure my teacher smirked. After two treatments I begged and pleaded with my somewhat smarter dad to intervene and stop this sadistic and embarrassing procedure. I do not think he was all that concerned about my medical situation, but he was anxious to save money.

I survived all this to finally read in the Ada News (years later) that an Ada Chiropractor had been arrested and convicted of bilking locals of their money. The x-ray machine was phony. He had a library of x-rays for any condition or disease and fake pictures to his/ their improvement. I happily showed mom the story. She said she never had heard of him and was sure I must be wrong. Oh well.

Have a happy week and if you happen to go have some x-rays made next week, you might want to look at your proofs first. Try to go and/or support your local church. Covid-19 vaccinations are on their way,

Wayne Bullard, DPh

cwaynebullard@gmail.com