Well, Nancy Pelosi gave in—finally—and signed the big Corona Bill that will hopefully give $1,200 in stimulus dollars to each taxpaying adult. The bill was stagnating for two or three days on her desk before she finally yielded to pressure and wrote her name on it. And what was her “excuse” for holding the bill up? She said she had to take some clauses and words out that “you know who” (Trump) had in it to divert much of the money to billionaires and CEO’s and thus, stealing from we worthy yet suffering taxpayers. So, I guess the money is on its way—to us. I hear the money will be sent to our banks for direct deposit and all you billionaires and CEO’s can just leave the bank lobbies and go home. Nancy cut you out.

I know from watching TV where money comes from. When a reporter asked a welfare mama “where does money come from anyway?” She said, “you know — the government — they prints it.” Well. That’s a relief.

The money we get may not cure Corona19, but it might help get the economy up and running. We hope. And if it doesn’t, President Trump assures us that there is more where that come from. He’ll just give that old printing press another good crank or two. Meanwhile, the downtown streets in rural America are empty. Tour companies are frantic and the tourist business even in Jerusalem is the worse since the Bubonic Plague. Honest. I read this online, so it must be right.

The only thing left in operation are the grocery stores and many of them have been wiped out of the highly desired toilet paper. Some stores still have it on the shelf, but others have been wiped clean. To cut back on crowded aisles, some stores were allowing only a given number of shopping carts in at a time. Seems the carts were getting jammed and some shoppers nerves are frayed. One shopper reported that another shopper, needing a cart just simply took hers. Not a good idea to have messed with her. All I got to say here is the original cart pusher won the push and shove and got to finish up her shopping.

This is a good time to take a cruise. Or not. Most of the big cruise ships are tied up and empty. Some are still cruising around, mostly empty and wondering what to do with their crews. Maybe we should just tell them to shove off — go take a cruise – just to keep on paddling. Tourist “traps” such as Las Vegas, Broadway in New York or the pyramids in Egypt — to name a few — are in floundering in “extremis”. The narrow streets in Jerusalem are silent and empty. “Worse its been since the Bubonic Plague,” says one salesman in Bethlehem. He must be very old to remember those times.

No funerals. Just graveside services and I don’t know how long that will last. But if you have a big funeral planned for yourself you should postpone your death unless you expect a crowd of less than six. Not many jobs either. Most factories are shut down to help keep this contagious virus at bay. Restaurants are reduced to car hopping and drivethroughs. I don’t know what the compulsive coffee drinkers down at the Quick-Pic are doing these days but one upshot of all this is we are all sitting around the house. Not working.

Gasoline is selling at 95cents a gallon in Oklahoma City. More and more shortages Loom. A manufacturer of urns delivered 40,000 to one big funeral outfit in China last week and this was in a two-day period. Wow! Even worse! The world’s largest Condom factory (located in Kuala Lumpar) shuttered its doors last week and I leave my readers to ponder what the side effects of this disaster portends.

Like most of you, I have been going to church on TV and I consider this a hardship. A Sunday without being in my “Cemetery Class” down at the First Baptist messes up my whole week. Hope all of you can cope with these unique times we find ourselves in.

Wayne Bullard, DPh cwaynebullard@gmail.com