If we are going to love like Jesus and fulfi ll the purpose of the church (John 13:34-35), we must understand that love does not willingly allow a friend to stay in sin. “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it?” (Rom. 6:1-2).

Jesus was straightforward with the truth even when it concerned His friends. “But He turned and said to Peter, ‘Get behind Me, Satan! You are an offense to Me, for you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men’” (Matt. 16:21). The twelve apostles were Jesus’ closest friends upon this earth, because they loved Him did their best to keep His will. “You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you” (Matt. 15:14-15).

When Jesus went to the garden of Gethsemane to pray, He took the twelve with Him. “Then they came to a place which was named Gethsemane; and He said to His disciples, ‘Sit here while I pray’ (Matt. 14:32). While Jesus was very close with the twelve, He had three disciples who were His inner circle of closest friends—Peter, James and John, whom He took a little further. “And He took Peter, James, and John with Him, and He began to be troubled and deeply distressed” (Matt. 14:33). Though these men were His closest of friends, He would not shy away from telling them the truth. While He was praying, His three closest friends fell asleep and He rebuked them for not watching and praying for even one hour, “What! Could you not watch with Me one hour?” (Matt. 26:40b).

Today, we sometimes try to soften the blow of the truth of God’s Word when we have friends who are living in sin so as not to offend them. We concern ourselves with the things of men instead of the things of God. However, Jesus did not do this when He was dealing with sinful men, even when these sinful men were His friends. He was straightforward with Peter, “you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men” (Matt. 16:23b). He did not soften the blow to spare Peter’s feelings, because Peter needed to hear the truth. If softening the blow of the truth allows your friend to stay in his or her sin, then it is not love that motivates you but a selfi sh ambition, because you are more concerned with keeping the friendship than with the person’s soul (Phil. 2:3-4). This action is selfi sh.

There are many ways this can be done, but one of the most common is when a person decides to forsake the assembly of the church (Heb. 10:25) for work, fishing, sleep, sporting events, or anything else, and a fellow Christian comforts this person in his sin, telling him it is okay. Both people would be guilty of not being mindful of the things of God but the things of men, because God’s Word, in Hebrews 10:25, clearly states that we are not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together. If we were to love this person and fulfill the purpose of the church, we would love as Jesus loves and be straightforward about the truth with this person. The truth is that forsaking the assembly is not being mindful of the things of God but of the things of men.

Just something to consider.