I’m thinking of my Dad this week as it would have been his 100th birthday. Among the many things when I think of Dad is his ability to fix almost anything around our house. He included me in any project he undertook. He instructed that I was the “B man” and he was the “A man”. The “A man” was in charge. The “B man” was the helper and cleaned up the mess afterward. I don’t think I ever graduated to “A man” status.

No matter what the task, Dad taught me some basic principles about home repairs.

Principle #1: Check the energy source. The first thing Dad always did was make sure the machine was plugged in. Many times, we discovered the reason something wasn’t working was because it didn’t have power. Dad always advised, “Before doing anything, check the power”.

Principle #2: Try the easy thing first. I always wanted to dive right in and dismantle whatever was broken. Dad wisely slowed me down. He counseled me not to assume the solution was complicated or required extensive work. Sometimes the problem was easily found and the repair was simple. “Try the easy thing first”, I still hear my father say.

Principle #3: Patiently stay at it. I spent a good deal of my young life holding a flashlight or handing tools to my dad like a nurse supplies a surgeon. I was usually impatient to be finished so I could go play. Dad would try one thing after another, sometimes for days, until he found the solution. He stubbornly refused to give up on achieving a successful repair. “You gotta stay at it until it’s fixed”, Dad observed.

I’m sorry to say I’m not nearly as talented in the home repair arena as my Dad. But I have learned to apply Dad’s home repair advice to family relationships that need fixing.

Principle #1. Check the energy source. Sometimes when we encounter a problem in family relationships it’s because there’s a problem with our energy source. Tempers flare and harsh words are spoken when we’re tired or our strength is depleted. At times like that we would do well to “check the power.” Maybe we need a nap before discussing some problem with our spouse. Perhaps we should get something to eat before launching into an impatient criticism of our children. When problems arise in relationships, check the power.

Principle #2: Try the easy thing first. When you have a dispute with a family member, don’t assume the worst. Give them the benefit of the doubt. The problem may have an easy fix if you don’t jump to a wrong conclusion. When conflicts arise in relationships, look for an easy solution first. The answer may be right before your eyes.

Principle #3: Patiently stay at it. In our family relationships we sometimes encounter issues that have no easy solution. That’s when we need to take a page from Dad’s home repair book. Be stubborn in working through difficult problems. Refuse to give up on finding a solution. Like my dad’s projects, it may take a long time to finally achieve a breakthrough. But if you stay at it, you’ll be proud of your accomplishment.

Dad probably didn’t know all he was teaching me when we worked on those home repair projects. I’m glad I was paying attention.

Happy Birthday Dad!